Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Friday, April 25, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Green is the New Extreme...
All right stop. Collaborate and listen.
Remember way back in the last century when Vanilla Ice unleashed "Ice Ice Baby" on our unsuspecting ears?
Not only did he give us the gift of the greatest one hit wonder followed by the saddest career this side of Dana Plato, his flowing prose launched a thousand ad campaigns.
Without bothering to the actual research, it's pretty safe to assume that sometime in 1990 there had to have been an ad exec who was stuck in traffic. And he was using that opportunity to listen to "Ice Ice Baby" on repeat on his brand new in-dash CD player that skipped like a smooth stone across a calm pond the moment his car started moving.
Probably by the 11th time through, the line "To the extreme I rock the mic like a vandal" hit our ad exec friend like a ton of bricks.
Or a pile of nachos. Extreme Nachos.
Or maybe that lyric wiped across his brain like an extremely powerful odor fighting stroke of Extreme Right Guard.
Or perhaps it skewered his mind like that raging bull you once saw on Extreme Animal Attacks.
It doesn't matter really because as far as marketing buzzwords go, extreme is dead.
Let's just hope it had a green funeral.
The other day I was on my to the ol' jobby job and waiting for a red light. I wasn't stuck in traffic because I wasn't driving. I was riding my bike like I do 4 days a week and like I've been doing since the zenith of extreme.
My commute, if you even want to call it that, is three miles each way. Without breaking a sweat it takes about 15 minutes door-to-door. By car this same jaunt ranges from a once in a blue moon 10 minutes to a slit your wrists with a rusty nail 35. But, most days it takes about 20.
Funny how that works.
So back to that red light.
While waiting for it to turn green, I noticed a new billboard telling me to "Move Green." A message that was brought to my attention by the Sundance Channel and eco-conscious folks at Lexus and Citi Smith Barney.
Check it out...
It didn't take long for my inner bike geek to notice that the bicycle featured on the billboard was a brakeless fixed gear bike.
Upon closer inspection, it just wasn't any ol' brakeless fixie but a IRO.
Allow me to count the ways this chaps my hide.
1) For 99.9% of the population a brakeless fixed gear is the wrong choice of bicycle. Oh sure not being able to coast gives you all the Zen bliss without the annoying I-had-to-forsake-Jesus aftertaste but in the pantheon of bicycle choices, I'd sandwich a fixed between a 20" BMX and a short wheelbased recumbent in terms of around town practicality.
Also, if this bike were really meant to be an eco-friendly commuter, where are the lights for night time use and the rack for hauling groceries (from the local farmer's market, natch). At least the art director gave a nod to all the hipsters out there. Judging by the buried saddle, who ever moves green on this machine is moving on the wrong sized bike.
2) All impracticality and bikesnobbery aside, this bike in question really won't illicit more than a impatient scoff from a motorist stuck in traffic. If you didn't know anything about bikes, what would this particular bike remind you of? That old, uncomfortable 10 speed you had as a kid or maybe rode to class in college if you predated the mountain bike? Yeah, I'm talking about the one that made you throw out your back when you heaved it into the bushes many years ago. Like, Robert Redford totally wants you to fish that boat anchor out of the shrubs and start pedaling it to work. It's up to you to save the world one rusty pedal stroke at a time.
3) The choice of featuring an IRO. While Tony probably feels like he pulled a major coup getting top billing on a billboard without having to pay for it, do you think he's losing any sleep at night over the fact that other than being painted green, his Taiwanese made bikes aren't exactly made the greenest? Sure, Taiwan pays better and has a better human rights record than its big brother China but what about environmental controls in manufacturing? What about that 3,000 mile boat ride his bikes have to take before being schlepped by truck to their final destination?
Granted, what he does is the same thing the big boys do but at least some of the big boys are actively trying to do something about it instead of trying to make anodized purple cool again.
Please, don't think of me bitter sort who rides his bike down to the beach on weekends just to poop in the ocean. It's just that I really have a hard time believing that "The Green" is nothing more than an attempt to cash in on a trend while the gettin' is good.
And you can't count me out- until green becomes Extreme Green.
Can you imagine how much sweeter American Gladiators would be if Wolf were jousting with a stick packed with repurposed plastic grocery bags?
Oh, it'd be a lot sweeter for sure.
Remember way back in the last century when Vanilla Ice unleashed "Ice Ice Baby" on our unsuspecting ears?
Not only did he give us the gift of the greatest one hit wonder followed by the saddest career this side of Dana Plato, his flowing prose launched a thousand ad campaigns.
Without bothering to the actual research, it's pretty safe to assume that sometime in 1990 there had to have been an ad exec who was stuck in traffic. And he was using that opportunity to listen to "Ice Ice Baby" on repeat on his brand new in-dash CD player that skipped like a smooth stone across a calm pond the moment his car started moving.
Probably by the 11th time through, the line "To the extreme I rock the mic like a vandal" hit our ad exec friend like a ton of bricks.
Or a pile of nachos. Extreme Nachos.
Or maybe that lyric wiped across his brain like an extremely powerful odor fighting stroke of Extreme Right Guard.
Or perhaps it skewered his mind like that raging bull you once saw on Extreme Animal Attacks.
It doesn't matter really because as far as marketing buzzwords go, extreme is dead.
Let's just hope it had a green funeral.
The other day I was on my to the ol' jobby job and waiting for a red light. I wasn't stuck in traffic because I wasn't driving. I was riding my bike like I do 4 days a week and like I've been doing since the zenith of extreme.
My commute, if you even want to call it that, is three miles each way. Without breaking a sweat it takes about 15 minutes door-to-door. By car this same jaunt ranges from a once in a blue moon 10 minutes to a slit your wrists with a rusty nail 35. But, most days it takes about 20.
Funny how that works.
So back to that red light.
While waiting for it to turn green, I noticed a new billboard telling me to "Move Green." A message that was brought to my attention by the Sundance Channel and eco-conscious folks at Lexus and Citi Smith Barney.
Check it out...
It didn't take long for my inner bike geek to notice that the bicycle featured on the billboard was a brakeless fixed gear bike.
Upon closer inspection, it just wasn't any ol' brakeless fixie but a IRO.
Allow me to count the ways this chaps my hide.
1) For 99.9% of the population a brakeless fixed gear is the wrong choice of bicycle. Oh sure not being able to coast gives you all the Zen bliss without the annoying I-had-to-forsake-Jesus aftertaste but in the pantheon of bicycle choices, I'd sandwich a fixed between a 20" BMX and a short wheelbased recumbent in terms of around town practicality.
Also, if this bike were really meant to be an eco-friendly commuter, where are the lights for night time use and the rack for hauling groceries (from the local farmer's market, natch). At least the art director gave a nod to all the hipsters out there. Judging by the buried saddle, who ever moves green on this machine is moving on the wrong sized bike.
2) All impracticality and bikesnobbery aside, this bike in question really won't illicit more than a impatient scoff from a motorist stuck in traffic. If you didn't know anything about bikes, what would this particular bike remind you of? That old, uncomfortable 10 speed you had as a kid or maybe rode to class in college if you predated the mountain bike? Yeah, I'm talking about the one that made you throw out your back when you heaved it into the bushes many years ago. Like, Robert Redford totally wants you to fish that boat anchor out of the shrubs and start pedaling it to work. It's up to you to save the world one rusty pedal stroke at a time.
3) The choice of featuring an IRO. While Tony probably feels like he pulled a major coup getting top billing on a billboard without having to pay for it, do you think he's losing any sleep at night over the fact that other than being painted green, his Taiwanese made bikes aren't exactly made the greenest? Sure, Taiwan pays better and has a better human rights record than its big brother China but what about environmental controls in manufacturing? What about that 3,000 mile boat ride his bikes have to take before being schlepped by truck to their final destination?
Granted, what he does is the same thing the big boys do but at least some of the big boys are actively trying to do something about it instead of trying to make anodized purple cool again.
Please, don't think of me bitter sort who rides his bike down to the beach on weekends just to poop in the ocean. It's just that I really have a hard time believing that "The Green" is nothing more than an attempt to cash in on a trend while the gettin' is good.
And you can't count me out- until green becomes Extreme Green.
Can you imagine how much sweeter American Gladiators would be if Wolf were jousting with a stick packed with repurposed plastic grocery bags?
Oh, it'd be a lot sweeter for sure.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Monday, April 14, 2008
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Friday, April 4, 2008
Editorial Comment
Sorry. No photo today. At least not yet anyway and I even brought along the "good camera" to take a picture of something I've been meaning to photograph for the better part of a week now but what I saw this morning was enough to make me forget all about it.
Today I was joined on my commute by another person on a bike. Actually I can't really say that I was joined because he not once but twice blew the stoplights at a couple of very busy intersections. And the kicker is that on the second there was myself and another dude on a bike (three people on bikes is nearly Chinese rush hour by LA standards).
But our little tube socked bike riding friend really didn't want to be our friend and blew through the light without an ounce of compunction.
If two cyclists waiting for a stoplight can't guilt another into waiting for the light then I guess the only thing that can is an up close and personal visit with the front of a Metro Bus.
Today I was joined on my commute by another person on a bike. Actually I can't really say that I was joined because he not once but twice blew the stoplights at a couple of very busy intersections. And the kicker is that on the second there was myself and another dude on a bike (three people on bikes is nearly Chinese rush hour by LA standards).
But our little tube socked bike riding friend really didn't want to be our friend and blew through the light without an ounce of compunction.
If two cyclists waiting for a stoplight can't guilt another into waiting for the light then I guess the only thing that can is an up close and personal visit with the front of a Metro Bus.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
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